Keepers Pro Schmo 2019-Results

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In the face of threatening weather, over 40 Keepers showed up to stage our annual Keepers Pro Schmo with a little help from 8 of their virtual friends.  Playing the “New North” the Keepers got to experience the changes to the front nine green complexes that have been under wraps all winter.

Top honors in the National League Division went to Ron “Big Sky” Hirschel who teamed with fiesty Ian Poulter to shoot Net 61 on their better ball.  Tied second with Net 62 were Steve “Gordo” Gordon/Jon Rahm and Guy “Parfait” Berliner/Phil Mickelson.

In the American League it was Mike “Not Lew” Selis who carried Kevin Kisner on his back on their way to a shooting Net 62 to win their division.    A bit of a traffic jam developed in second place with Net 63 involving Steve “Peleton” Lustig/Kiradech Aphibarnrat, Len “The Plumber” Goldman/Justin Harding, and Bobby “Jack Lalanne” Fogel/Kiradech Aphibarnrat.  Fortunately no air bags were deployed.

(Click to see the full field Pro-Schmo Results and Prizes)


The Net Pars or Better Kash Game raised the first $350 toward The Keepers year-end military charity donations and paid out some walk around Kash Money to six Keepers who led this kompetition.

Net Pars or Better Payouts:

1st  Ron Hirschel 24 Points  $100 kash

T-2nd Paul Cohen and  Mike Selis 20 Points $75 kash each

T-4th Len Goldman, Sol Gordon, and Rich Greenberg 19 Points $30 kash each


The season ramps up quickly as we move into May with a Four-Club, Kolor War, and the first two of the Alt-Shot Series matches coming your way.  Stay tuned for the announcements and sign ups over the next few weeks.  Thanks to all who participated in kicking off our 12th Keepers Season.

Keepers Kahootz-Alternate Shot Series Finale Fore 2018

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Some things are worth waiting for but we might have tested the merit of that wisdom. as it took us four months before we finally got the Final Fore of the Keepers Kahootz Alternate Shot Series in the books.

There were four battle tested teams that survived the first three matches in May, June, and July and were still vying for the super kool trophies and a piece of the $750 in sweeps in the final two matches held this month.  Points scored in these matches would determine the final order of merit for the prizing.





(Click to see the standings going into the Finale Fore)

The contestants for the Final Fore matches were:

Mike “Koach” Fisher and Ronnie “I Am Due” Rosenberg

Randy “Been There Before” Weiss and Mark “M.A.” Goldstein

Len “The Plumber” Goldman and Moe “The Kommish” Dweck

Steve “The Breeze” Lerman and Ron “Slow Glide” Edlavitch

The Plumber and The Kommish took the top prize by 1/2 a furlong

Giving six shots in the first of the Final Fore matches, Fisher and Rosenberg had their work cut out for them.  Closely kontested through the first six holes it was 3-3 heading to the 7th Tee.  There were no halved holes on the front side, in fact only two halved holes in the entire match.

But Mike and Ronnie started to assert themselves winning 5 of the next 7 holes from 7 to 13 taking kontrol of the match by four points.  Two forgetables on 14 and 15 gave Weiss-Goldstein some hope, but some forgetables of their own left them reeling and Fisher and Rosenberg closed out the match 11 to 7, setting a high bar to beat in the other match.

Tale of the tape from the first of the Final Fore Matches

In the second match Lenny and Moe volleyed back and forth with Steve and Ron through the front 8 making the mini-turn up 4 1/2 to 3 1/2.  But on the back 10, The Plumber and The Kommish put on a Ham and Egg Routine that would make any Waffle House manager proud as they did not lose a hole the rest of the way.

With two holes to play they needed to will a half and a win to break through the 11 point barrier and snatch the whole kitten kaboodle.  That is what they did, grinding out the win 11 1/2 to 6 1/2.

Dead Sea Scrolls account of Match 2 konfrontation…written in Aramaic



We set a Keepers record with 24 teams, 48 players kompeting in this year’s Alternate Shot Series.  This format is fast, furious, and fun and will undoubtedly be back for a fifth iteration next spring.  I am sure there are a couple of teams already chomping at the bit for another opportunity to be the Foursomes Champions of The Keepers.

Men’s Play For P.I.N.K. 2018

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Play for P.I.N.K is one of the biggest annual fund raising events run by the Ladies of Woodmont and the men have shown support for this effort the last two years with a Men’s Play For P.I.N.K. Tournament.

All those participating made a $50 donation to Play for P.I.N.K. which uses the proceeds to support Breast Cancer Research.  40 players participated this year, and The Keepers provided the Kash Sweeps Prizes for the low net scores of the event.

This year’s winner was Mike Selis who shot a 3-Under net score, followed by Kevin Bass who took second at 1-Under.  Here is the list of the Kash Sweeps Winners:

1st Place Mike Selis  3-Under  $100 Kash Sweeps

2nd Place Kevin Bass 1-Under  $70 Kash Sweeps

T-3rd Place Artie Aronoff, Jim Polsky, Sam Werner, and Harry Harrison Even Par $32.50 Kash Sweeps

Thanks to everyone who supported this year’s Men’s Play For P.I.N.K. that raised over $2,000 for this worthy cause.



Keepers Kup Finale 2018-Results

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The Golf Goddesses manipulated a few low pressure systems on our behalf and, as a result, we were able to get in the Season Ending Keeper Kup Finale over the weekend.  39 Keepers kompeted for the Kopper Kups, Piles of Sweeps, and some Kash Winnings.  This was no ride in the park as the North Course played long because of the recent rains and the rough was gnarly.  The day would prove to be a test of perseverance.

The Lead Dog going into the Finale was Marc “I am sticking with the Ping” Birnbaum who has had a tremendous run of form the last two months on the Keepers circuit.  If the challenge was not to come from the rest of the top five, Marc would have to grind out a competent round to hold his position and the Keepers Kup at the end of the day.  He did just that shooting 82 net 74 to tie 11th in the Finale and hold on to win the year-long kompetition.

Birnie…..the winner and new champion………

In a rabid come-from-behind wave from Lakewood expatriates, the top two spots in the Kup Finale went to Don Fisher and Howie Stein respectively.  Don shot a 73 net 67 on a very challenging course.  He was 3-Over through the first three holes but played the inward nine in 2-under 34 to take the top prize for the Kup Finale, the embroidered Keepers K Flag, and a bunch of sweeps.  This also vaulted him from 17th to 2nd in the Final Keepers Kup Standings which will earn him a Kopper Kup and more sweeps.

Don shot a scorching net 67 to win the Finale Event


Here is the evidence…..


Howie Stein, the reigning Keepers Match Play Champion, was almost Don’s equal shooting a 76 net 69 to take second place in the Finale and move up to 8th in the Keepers Kup Standings to grab the last spot in the Kash Sweeps Payoff Line.  Steve Keller had a 85 net 70 to take third in the Finale.

Howie has done a lot of Keepers pointing of late….

(Click to see the detail of the full field scoring)


The highlight of the day for five Keepers was the random drawing of the 50/50 raffle which paid off $145 per man.  Through the generosity of all who participated, we raised an additional $745 for beneficiary organizations to our Year End Military Donations-Folds of Honor, SMGA/Wounded Vets, Israeli Defense Wounded Veterans, and the Links To Freedom.

The single-digit raffle players….


Yesterday’s kompetition was a perfect ending to the Keepers 11th Season.  We appreciate the work of Konnor and the golf staff in helping put on this traveling circus all year.  Special thanks to all of you whose enthusiastic participation in our Keepers events through the year make the Keepers program something special.

Keepers Match Play 2018-Results

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The Year-Long Keepers Match Play for 2018 was our annual off-road test-guys had to survive extreme conditions in 5 matches against players of similar handicap to win their bracket.  The Bracket Winners then had to win two more matches in the Final Fore to kash in on the prizes.

We started in April with over 100 Keepers, and it took five months of single elimination matches to get through this kompetition.  There were lots of heroics-come from behind victories, extra hole Sudden Death Playoffs, and grind it out gritty golf-before we whittled it down to the Final Fore.

Bracket Champions:

Howie Stein  Augusta Bracket     Rich Greenberg  Shinnecock Hills Bracket  

Rick Goldstein Carnoustie Bracket  Eddie Cohen  Bellerive Bracket.


The Final Fore brought more kompelling dramatics.  In the Semi-Final round, Howie “I Can Play Nice With Anyone” Stein beat Rick “Now You Know Who I Am” Goldstein, the Carnoustie champion, to get to the final match.  Rich “Kojak” Greenberg outlasted Eddie “Two on Nobody Out” Cohen, the Bellerive winner in the other Semi-Final.

Finals Kompetitors in Arms…Howie and Rich on the 5th Tee of the North

The Final Match was played on a hot and sticky September morning on the North Course which measured over 6400 yards from the tees they were playing.  No roll in the fairway and wet and gnarly rough put a premium on keeping your ball between the hash marks.  With only 3 shots being given in the match between Howie and Rich, it was destined to be a tight affair.

A little nervy, they tied the opening hole with matching bogies.  For Howie it was fairways and greens the rest of the outward nine as he threw down 8 pars in a row to shoot a strong gross 37 and build up a commanding 3 up lead at the turn.  Needing a drastic change in the character of play Kojak could not find his ballast on the back going 5-over in the first five and succumbing to the relentless Stein Express 5 & 4.

The Tale of the Tape……..

The Keepers Match Play remains the centerpiece of the Keepers Season and the change in the brackets to align players of similar ability was a big hit.  This made for some very fiesty matches throughout the kompetition.  Congratulations to all our deserving bracket champions and the King of them all Howie Stein.


Payoffs for the final fore:

1st Place      Howie Stein        Overall Winner’s Trophy, Augusta Winner’s Plaque- 200 Additional Kup Points Earned- $300 Kash Sweeps

2nd Place    Rich Greenberg   Shinnecock Hills Winner’s Plaque- 100 Additional Kup Points Earned- $200 Kash Sweeps

T-3rd Place Rick Goldstein and Eddie Cohen- Carnoustie and Bellerive Winner’s Plaques and 50 Additional Kup Points Earned- $100 Kash Sweeps each man

Keepers Blind Fours Results-2018

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The last weekday night event of the Keepers season attracted 40 of our guys in a new format we called Keepers Blind Fours.  Playing net best ball as a two-man team each pair played 12 holes on the South Course with the goal being to win the most points in three blind draw 4-hole matches officiated at dinner.

It was a noisy and rowdy atmosphere at dinner when cards were randomly pulled from the Keepers Sack and cards were matched and points were kalculated.

Busting out of the gate for 8 points in the first 4-hole match Eddie “Two On Nobody Out” Cohen and Monroe “Been on IR and back” Brett took a kommanding lead with the next nearest teams garnering 5 points in the first session.  They backed it up nicely with steady play scoring 5 and 3 points respectively in the last two 4-hole stanzas to get 16 points and notch the victory worth 150 Kup Points and $100 in Kash Sweeps per man.

The winning pair still wearing their game faces

Three teams tied for second with 15 points-Howard “Stogie” Wollner/Marc “Walking Man” Birnbaum, Randy “I Got This” Weiss/Mark “A” Goldstein, and Michael “Don’t Leave Me Out” Levy/Don “The Other Fish” Fisher-winning 90 Kup Points and $25 Kash Sweeps per man.  Howard Vogel and Ed Wallach snuck into third with 14 points for 30 Kup Points each.

Thanks to all who participated tonight and Barker Konnor Farrell for his adept handling of the scorecard mayhem.

Keepers Pinehurst Glenmorangie Results-2018

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This was our second time around with The Pinehurst Glenmorangie, a novel two-man format which blended a bit of Scramble and a hint of Alternate Shot into an original tasteful single malt offering.  Picking their own partners the guys had to hit their drives, swap balls for the second shot, and then pick the best result to play the rest of the way into the hole alternate shot.  The objective for the day is low team net and it would take something in the mid-sixties to be in the money.

What is kool about this version is that to win you have to play the Par 3’s well, getting two balls on the green to give your team more opportunities for net birdies or better.  The 5 Pars on the other hand are high pressure seeing that they are shot holes where a net par probably loses a shot to the field.

The kompetition proved tight with only two shots separating all the guys who ended up in the money.  Howard “Stogie” Wollner and Marc “I Am Getting Used To Pointing At The Scoreboard” Birnbaum edged out the field with a fine net 65 on the South Course.  Let it be noted that course improvement work left us with three Par 3’s in the last five holes and it was very important to apply principle #1 above to be successful today.

Stogie and Birnie pointing again…it is a scene we are getting used to

Three teams of widely variant resumes managed to post 66 to tie for second.  Allen “Letting It All Hang Out” Zweig teamed with Jimmy “Here and There” Polsky to post one 66.  Len “You Got 24 Hour Plumbing Needs” Goldman and Moe “The Kommish with two “M’s” Dweck posted another.  The third pairing at this number was Mike “Don’t Give My Points To My Brother” Selis who played very nicely with Arnie “I’ve Got Eyes For You” Miller.  The last team in the money with net 67 was Mark “Time Clock” Goldstein and Randy “Edel” Weiss.

The Prizes (per man):

1st Place at Net 65  Marc Birnbaum/Howard Wollner  300 Kup Points and $100 Kash Sweeps

T-2nd Place at Net 66  Allen Zweig/Jimmy Polsky-Len Goldman/Moe Dweck-Mike Selis-Arnie Miller 150 Kup Points and $25 Kash Sweeps

5th Place at Net 67  Mark A. Goldstein/Randy Weiss 50 Kup Points

Thanks to the 36 guys who participated and to Konnor Farrell for his professional administration of today’s event.

Keepers Kolor Skirmish 2018-Results

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Kompacted to fit into a Tuesday evening, our annual team event, the Keepers Kolor Skirmish, was waged on the South Course.  The three Superhero Teams scratched out 18 holes of Almost Skins (5-3-1), no strokes given kompetition, against opponents of equal skills in pursuit of team points for Kash Sweeps and some very kute Bobblehead Trophies for individual MVPs on each squad.

Team Batman, led by a 67 point MVP Performance of their fearless leader, Rick “I’m in it for the long haul” Brecher took the day with a convincing 562 point total in the team event.  They got strong support from Billy “Down to under 250 shirts” Burak, Don “You can forget about that other Fisher” Fisher, Nelson “Keep an eye on me” Cohen,  and Chet “In pursuit of yellow” Levine, who grabbed 60 points or more in the team win.  They earned $50 each in Kash Sweeps for the effort.

The winning Batman roster: Chet Levine, Steve Lustig, Keith Eig, Len Goldman, Kaptain Rick Brecher, Nelson Cohen, Billy Burak, Don Fisher, Sol Gordon, and Harry Harrison

The second place team with 546 points was Superman, kaptained by Eddie “Klark Kent” Cohen, who used a stellar 66 point MVP Performance by Jimmy “Boom Boom” Polsky to give ’em something to worry about’.  Fine play by Neal “I’ll Be There” Bobys and Craig “Better than good” Goodman helped the Men of Steel take home $25 Kash Sweeps a man.

Superman Squad: Jimmy Polsky, Allen Zweig, Moe Dweck, Mike Selis, Peter Robinson, Michael Levy, Mark A. Goldstein, Kaptain Eddie Cohen, Craig Goodman, and Neal Bobys


Green Lantern: Kaptain Ronnie Greenbaum, Steve Keller, Paul Cohen, Rick Cohen, Arnie Miller, Marc Birnbaum, Steve Lustgarten, Ron Kleinman, Dale Baker, and Bob Yabroff
The full story!!

The Keepers Kup Points go to the top three individual point performers on each of the Superhero Teams.  The lead MVPs get the always handsome Bobblehead Trophy and 200 Kup Points per man and the second and third place get 100 and 50 Kup points respectively.

Team MVP Results:


Rick Brecher  Trophy and 200 Kup Points

Billy Burak 100 Kup Points

Nelson Cohen and Don Fisher 50 Kup Points each


Jimmy Polsky Trophy and 200 Kup Points

Neal Bobys 100 Kup Points

Craig Goodman 50 Kup Points

Green Lantern:

Ron Greenbaum and Paul Cohen Trophy and 200 Kup Points each

Ron Kleinman 100 Kup Points

Steve Lustgarten 50 Kup Points


Kaptain Rick Brecher getting to know his MVP trophy


Ronnie Greenbaum’s second MVP performance…his shelf is developing MVP Klutter

The Players Pool Kash Game generated another $240 toward our year-end Military Charities Donation.  Top five individual points across all teams took home the kash.

Players Pool Kash Winnings:

1st-67 Points  Rick Brecher  $70 Kash

2nd-65 Points  Billy Burak   $60 Kash

3rd-64 Points  Neal Bobys  $50 Kash

T-4th-63 Points Nelson Cohen, Don Fisher, Craig Goodman  $20 Kash

Thanks to all 30 guys who made the evening success.  Special thanks to Dale Baker for stepping in for one our our guys and Konnor Farrell and Jake Thompson for putting on the show.

Keepers Five Club 2018-Results

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In last evening’s entertaining Keepers Five Club (KFC) we had 26 Keepers kontesting the front of the North with just five clubs in their bags.  To make it even more interesting trying to select their clubs for the evening,  they played the holes from variegated tees they were not accustomed to.

For example, the Par 3 2nd was off the forward tee at 145 and the Par 3 6th was 175 off the blue tee.  The Par 5 5th played from the front tee as a Par 4 at a mere 380 yards up the hill and the 9th was played from the Mr. Peadbody Way-Back Tee at 495 yards as a Par 5.

With the benefit of Konnor and Andy’s new toy, the Club Genius phone app, we were able to provide live scoring through the event.  We are still working out the details with the Golf Channel so the world can watch this stuff live streaming.  Following the progress of others as we went was definitely added pressure.  Still there were plenty of scores under par and it was a tightly kontested event to the end.

Coming right out of the gate Rick “The Itinerant Keeper” Brecher net eagled the first and the third to get to 4-Under standing on the 4th tee.  A slight deviation on the 4th but Rick had a bounce back birdie on the renewed Par 4 5th.  Playing the rest of the way even par he finished 4-Under to take second and win 120 Keepers Kup Points and $50 in Kash Sweeps.

Ronnie “Now You Will Know My Name” Rosenberg had the true roller koaster Five Club experience by making a birdie net double eagle on the Par 5 3rd to get to 3-Under in a hurry.  A net bogie, birdie, bogie, birdie, bogie finish from 5 to 9 respectively to finish 3rd place at 3 under had to test his blood pressure range.  He earned 90 Keepers Kup Points and $25 in Kash Sweeps for his evening work.

The top prize of 150 Kup Points and $100 Kash Sweeps went to Paul “Single Malt” Cohen with a scintillating 5-Under par performance over this difficult track.  He net birdied the first three holes to establish the beachhead and then birdied the long uphill 5th before making his only slip with a bogey on the 7th.  Playing the 8th from the forward tee at 285 he mastered the task well making a net birdie there and finished in style  on the Par 5 9th, where we played the tee ball from the Clyde’s parking lot, with a 5 net 4 birdie to seal the deal at 5-Under.

Kaptin Keith Eig and Steve “Get Used To Me On The Leaderboard” Lerman finished tied fourth at 2-Under to earn 45 Keepers Kup Points each.

Pablo Cohen returns with an adult beverage in hand to celebrate his first place finish

Just another fun Keepers evening of “Fake Golf” was enjoyed by all who participated.  Kongratulations to all the winners.

Keepers Pro-Schmo 2018-Results

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With a little help from 8 of their virtual friends, 36 Keepers participated in the annual Keepers Pro Schmo on a beautiful spring day for golf.  There were plenty of high fives and fist pumps as they kicked off the Keepers Season in a rollicking fashion.

Top honors in the National League Division went to Gary “Pinehurst Sigma Phi” Faigen who ham-n-egged it with a resurgent Eldrick Woods to shoot a workmanlike net 58 0n the South Course.  Gary made net birdies on 9, 12, and 16 to carry his partner down the stretch and win the division.

In the American League it was a log jam at the top.  It took net 60 from Marc “Been Working On My Game” Birnbaum and Cameron Smith, Phil “Just Arrived” Cantor and Paul Casey, Steve “Kontrolled Swerve” Lustig and Jordan Spieth, and Artie “She Tells Me This Is My Year” Aronoff and Jordan as well to win this division.

The Net Pars or Better Kash Game raised the first $360 toward The Keepers year-end military charity donations and paid out some walk around Kash Money to seven Keepers who led this kompetition.

Net Pars or Better Payouts:

1st  Neal Bobys 23 Points  $90 kash

T-2nd Marc Birnbaum and Phil Cantor 18 Points $60 kash each

T-4th Artie Aronoff, Keith Eig, Steve Lustgarten, and Howard Wollner  17 Points $30 kash each


It was nice of the 8 pros to show up for the festivities


Gary Faigen and Tiger share the team victory grin


(Click to see the full field Pro-Schmo Results and Prizing)

The season ramps up quickly as we move into May with a reinvented 5-Club, Kolor War, and the first of the Alt-Shot Series matches coming your way.  Stay tuned for the announcements and sign ups over the next few weeks.  Thanks to all who participated in kicking off our 11th Keepers Season.